Whelp it's almost a month since my last post.

And this will probably be my last post. Oh, don't worry you haters. I'll still be talking about things you don't care about: only this time you get to see my monkey face and hear donkey voice. That's right, I'm vlogging. Not now though. Now is study time. But soon after that. I'm no sure whether or not I'll be updating this site with the videos or not or just directly link you to the YouTube profile. Either way this will be done hopefully everyday until I can (hopefully) leave this god-forsaken country. Beyond that I'll see what I'll do with it. Probably burn it in Blu-Ray and save it for future taunts. Hmm. Well, bye.

The best crackers that I ever put in my mouth.

But really, it's like I've died and went to cheese heaven. I got the last and only bag in Soon Lee and if anyone else sees more of this ANYWHERE tell me. I've gone two weeks without Soon Lee having any restocks and my need Ritz Toasted Chips right now. It's made in the US and comes in Original, Cheese, Sour Cream and Vegetable.

I don't like posting these apology posts...

...but I have to. I'm busy with exams. BRB.

Internet TV? Not for Bruneians you tech-greedy monkeys, you. :D

The main feature of Sony's new internet TV is online HD video streaming.

Sorry to burst your bubble but you need a 7mbps (probably more) for your shows or movies to load fast. Guess what, Brunei's broadband goes up to a whopping 0.9mbps. Have fun waiting for a DAY to watch one movie, sucking up the internet for other users.

PS Netflix, Hulu, and most other TV streaming sites have restricted access to their content to only the US. So yeah all you can do with your Internet TV is browse. Have fun.

Spoons and vegetables.

When I order leafy vegetables in restaurants, they give it to me in a plate with a spoon. How can I take my vegetables with a spoon? Do they NOT know what a spoon is for? Do I give you a fork when you order soup? Do I give you knifes when you order chips? Do I give you a dagger when you want to shoot a plane down? Do I give you a PSP when you want to play Pokemon!? Goddamit.

Worst days of my life.

Worried about exams.
Worried about Uni.
Worried about my future.
Worried about my piano aural exams.
Been tired physically from running around too much.
Been tired mentally from thinking too much.
Not much progress in my Japanese proficiency.

Getting old.

Amazon is still not dropping the price on my Blu-Rays.

Video games aren't getting any cheaper.

Fanboy jerks everywhere.

Douchebags in school.

Tons of homework.

TV isn't as good as they used to be.
Music getting more teeth-grating by the release.
Films getting generic by the release.
Video games all delayed.
Teeth not getting any whiter.
Acne not going anywhere.
Rib outlines still visible.
Acne scars everywhere.
Chicken Pox scars everywhere.
Nose still has blackheads.
Voice still unheard.
Knees still look like door knobs.
Hair still dryer than my lips.
Did I mention dry lips?
Allergies acting up since 2008.
Right eye still flaking skin.
Almost legal age. Still not feeling like I want to grow up.
Leaving Brunei in a year. WHO WILL CUT MY HAIR?
Worried of cancer. All cancers.
Worried of diabetes.
Worried of a stroke.
Social levels at a stand-still.
Still mending a broken friendship.
Still harbouring lovey-dovey wishful thoughts.
Still getting mixed signals.
Abandonment issues coming back.
Still no news on the Japan trip.
Secrets I want to share, but alas can't.
Can't find a shop to print my cards.
Can't find a second-hand electone.
Spiritually confused.
*censored* confused.
Still not doing sports, which is bad for my heart.
Thinking of the regrets I've made.

Normally I'm not this kind of person but lately all the stress has been getting to me. The first time I felt like this in years. =( LOL emo teenage rant. Peace.

Technically, that ain't right.

1) A cook is someone that can cook. A chef is a cook that has mastered culinary art and actually has a certificate to certify he is a chef. Ergo, a cook is an umbrella term that includes a chef, along with caterers and fast-food designers.

2) Sitting near a TV and watching from that distance won't hurt your eyes at all. Well, permanently at least. You'll definitely get eye strain and fatigue but it's never permanent. However if you're thinking along the lines of harmful radiation, unless you're still using box TVs and monitors, then your current LED, LCD and Plasma screens are designed not to emit harmful radiation.

3) If a piece of music has no words, it's technically not a song. No, bird songs are different. Birds can't speak, silly. According to Merriam-Webster's definition of a song, a song is poetry given a melody build with the words.

4) Here in Brunei, the age where you are legally an adult is 18. Therefore a Sweet Eighteen is more appropriate than a Sweet Sixteen. However, given how stupid it is to say Sweet Eighteen, I declare it to be renamed 'Epic Eighteen'.

5) A Jacuzzi is not a noun but actually a proper noun and a brand of a hot-tub. Of course over the years, it became generic. Another example would be Escalators, Yo-Yos, Thermos and Zipper.

6) When you use direct heat, with the lid open so all the smoke escapes, you're grilling. When you're using indirect, slow heat; plus closing the cover when putting your meat on the grill, letting the smoke infuse into the meat, giving it a slight charcoal aftertaste, you're doing a barbeque.

7) When you told the waitress you wanted cola, and she gives you a Pepsi, technically she's right. After you didn't say you wanted Coca-Cola. You wanted cola.

8) As of a few years ago, 'homosexual' is now offensive and they'd prefer if you referred to them as gay. Similarly, it's best not to say 'Asian' anymore when referring to a single person. Like.'Oh, he's Asian' I'm sure there're other Asians besides the Chinese.

That's it for now. If I come across with more I'll post a sequel.

Mainstream supremacy.

So I was on this gaming forum and I'm having a discussion about what video games I love. One guy asked 'Hey, what do you think of (some generic FPS)?' I replied that I don't really like that game, or genre and all of a sudden I get flacked not only by that guy but a bunch of people. Out of defence I said 'Dude I didn't say it sucked. I just don't like it.' Eventually their idiocy drove me out of the forum.

Then it hit me. Wow, I wonder that there'll be quite a number that have talked about me behind my back for not liking the South Korean pop culture; Beats headphones; action-heavy, plot-light movies and first-person shooters. People, just because I don't like a certain something does not imply that I think it sucks. Do you go to a restaurant, and the head chef recommends a steak, you say that you don't like steak and the staff yells at you for not ordering steak? "BUY THE F*CKING STEAK YOU CHEAP B*STERD OR GET OUT." I'm pretty sure I'm not alone at this. I'm speaking on behalf of DoTA players, rock music listeners, rom-com lovers, food critics, 'hipster' sport athletes and so on. God-damn mainstream supremacy. I'm not implying that mainstream suck and anti-mainstream is better; vice-versa.There is no 'which is better'. Here's to preferential equality!

So I'm thinking about adding film reviews here.

To prevent any bias from occurring, three reviews of the same film will be posted. During-movie impressions, post-viewing impressions and in-depth analysis. Yeah...

The biggest jerks in school...

...are the group of people that like to walk in a row. SOME people are in a rush and can't overtake when they need to. When one yells 'Excuse me', those words are white noise. Probably too engaged in an in-depth conversation accompanied why the shrill, eardrum-piercing squeals of a fangirl... or boy.

Queue Lines

I never understood why people like to squeeze real close in queues. Close as in crotch-to-back close. Gurl, no matter how close you to the next guy the line ain't gonna move any faster. And I don't wanna feel obliged to pay extra attention at the guy in front of me whether or not he took at step forward.

For a week I have counted cars that passed by...

...and I found out on average, for every 10 cars that pass by 7 only had one person driving. Shame people. For a country trying to be green, they sure aren't encouraging car-pooling.

Autotune: It's a tool, not an instrument.

The majority of songs nowadays are plagued with auto-tuned singers (I refuse to call them 'artists'); so much so that there is a generation of people that believe that singers sound all robot-y to sound cool when in actual fact is to hide their lack of actual singing prowess.

Granted, using minimal, hardly-noticable auto-tune is fine for studio recording since y'know they want the album to sell. Taylor Swift comes to mind.

But 1998 auto-tune gained mainstream success when Cher's Believe was released. That song was intense auto-tuned one wouldn't recognize it was really her.

And because of that one song, the music industry had never been the same. Anyone who HAD a voice could release a single, as long as they had the $$$. Ke$ha anyone? It was hard to difference faux singers from the true artistes.

An excerpt of Time magazine:

"It's a technology that can make bad singers sound good and really bad singers (like T-Pain, pictured here) sound like robots. And it gives singers who sound like Kanye West or Cher the misplaced confidence that they too can croon. Thanks a lot, computers."

Things adults say #1: How are your kids?

Mom: Hi (friend)!
Friend: (Random chatter) And how are your kids?
Mom: Oh, they're big now.

Duh. Of course we're big now. What? We shrunk in your absence?

If I were a typical blogger...

...I would say something like this:

 Before loving others, you must love yourself. <3 =3

Hipster makes a meme #1: reCAPTCHArt

First of all, what is a CAPTCHA?

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/CAPTCHA

Then what is CAPTCHArt?

http://www.captchart.com/

Go here for more info.

http://inglipnomicon.wikia.com/wiki/Inglipnomicon_Wiki

Seems like a fun meme, I'm gonna give it a try.

Hipster Insights #3 Baby heads.

If I let a baby wear a cubic helmet, given a baby's malleable skull, when it's around a few years old, I remove the helmet. It would be so funny to have a square-headed child.

Michael Jackson and Elvis, disrespected.

When Elvis died, fans mourned. A few months later people started to do Elvis impersonations. Now it's happening to MJ. Why? If I were MJ I'd tell God to zap anyone who did it.

Hipster is NOT a hypocrite.

So you all know I'm not exactly a big fan of Steve Jobs. People like to say I'm a hypocrite behind my back and it's perfectly reasonable. But I think it's time you all need to know. No, I'm not one.

Apple fanboy - "Hey, Wei Lun. If you HAAAAAATE Apple so much why do you own an iPad?"

Me - "Dude, take a chill-pill. It came with the car."

Apple fanboy - "So why do you keep using it when you hate it?"

Me - "Beggars can't be choosers. When life gives you lemons, make a lemonade. You know what I mean."

Apple fanboy - "Wei Lun. Y U no sell?"

Me - "My parents bought the car. Not me. Ergo that iPad is theirs."

You'd never think I would say this but...

...I've given up on sitcoms. I haven't given up on comedy though, so it's K.


I remember just a few months ago, every day after school. I'd throw my bag on the floor, go straight to my computer and turn on PPS. Hoping for the next episode of The Big Bang Theory. Back then, food and other things weren't that important. All I needed was a good laugh. Now that passion is gone. Sitcoms became DEAD TO ME.


1) There are too many sitcoms out there.
Every September (September is like TV's birthday. It's the month where new TV shows come up) a popular channel would spawn up around 10-15 sitcoms. However only 3-5 will make it the first season. Why? Because there are literally dozens of sitcoms out there about romance and friendship. So there's bound to be ideas that overlap. Jokes you've heard. Antics you've seen. This year alone I've seen 3 Friends clones. Where's originality? Sorry but I'm out.


2) Diamonds aren't forever.
Of the 3-5 that are so original and funny they make it out alive, they go stale. Quick. Take for example Two and a Half Men. For the first few seasons they were pretty funny. (Sex jokes aren't really my thing but it's Jake that got me hooked.) Eventually during the 3rd season onwards things got boring. It was always the same thing. Alan trying to find love. Charlie getting drunk. Jake being Jake. Around the 7th season they even recycled jokes. So during the second last season (before it was cancelled) I gave up. 8 years of sex jokes were more than enough. Which brings me to this:


3) They drag on FAR TOO LONG.
Today everything revolves around money. Popular sitcoms tend to last almost a decade. Sure they're raking up money as we speak. (Fun fact: Even after it ends they still get paid through syndicated TV shows. Jerry Seinfeld earned USD$100mil from his sitcom Seinfeld even though the show ended 13 years ago.) When TV shows go for too long, ideas run stale. Scrubs comes to mind.


Sometimes TV shows are staying on air for far too long they tend to insert filler episodes (episodes that has nothing to do with the main plot). This pisses a lot of people off. We want to know how he met his kid's mother. We don't care about other things.


4) Change for the worse
Sometimes sitcoms lose contact with their roots. The best example I could think of right now is The Big Bang Theory. TBBT initially was about a bunch of geniuses interacting with a hot blonde. Now it's this weird romance thing. And they're no longer portrayed as nerds but geeks. I love geeks as much as the next guy but where's the intellectual banter? Where's the quick-witted Physics/Math quips? I miss those. Frankly if it we'rent for Amy Fowler I would have left the series. She's the only one doing this.
___________________________________________________

Truth be told the only TV comedy genre that never failed to give me a chuckle or two are single camera comedies (Glee, 30 Rock, The Office, Parks and Recreations, Community, Modern Family, Cougar Town to name a few) and improvisational TV shows (Curb Your Enthusiasm, 30 Rock, Improv-a-Ganza). 

Single camera comedies are unique. They seem to be the most unique of all premises. Jokes that are all fresh. New. And doesn't need to rely on sex jokes to give a good laugh. Kudos to the writers. Single camera comedies always start out horrible. Like really bad. This gives them the incentive to work harder Season 2 onwards and from there the ratings SOAR.

Glee for example started off as a black comedy. Black comedies are one of the best genres of all time frankly speaking but it doesn't go hand-in-hand with the show's musical, gleeful high school premise (pun totally intended) Season 2 onwards they ditched the whole irony and sarcasm with something more witty and BOOM success and main appeal. Glee (as of 2010) has the most Billboard positions than any group/artist.

Parks and Recreations started off as a boring clone of The Office but Season 2 onwards, they started to flesh out their characters and gave a premise of their own.

Cougar Town started off with the worse premise ever. A old lady looking to prey on a young man. That's just creepy. Season 2 they started exploring the lives of each of lovable friends of the circle. A better Friends 2.0. Sad they can't change the name. They tried to convince the studios to change it but the contract said they can't. So yeah.

 __________________________________________________

Enough of this useless rant. I'll go watch some 30 Rock. Peace.

Hipster Likes #3 - TVTropes.org

Visit this site: tvtropes.org

It's kinda like a website for cliches (called tropes) found in media. Be it stories, movies, film, video games, anime or music. Anything. Only thing is, technically they're not cliches. Tropes are like elements found in media. Like for example in RPGs, The Knight In Shining Armour is the hero that always comes and rescue the princess. Or The Backstabber which is common in lots of stories. It's kinda hard to explain until you really get to this website. I'm totally recommending this if you love seeing your favourite stories or movies at a different angle.

Note: If you're lost, just type your favourite whatever in the search bar and click on one of the pages and start learning from there. It's truly an interesting read. From there every blue highlighted term is a trope (again kinda like a cliche but not one) and you can even go to that tropes wiki to see that same trope on other media.

Hipster Likes #2 - Space Channel 5

Even though this isn't the best graphics on a PS2, it's still incredibly fun. Space Channel 5 is a rhythm game where you play as Ulala, a young sassy space reporter. While on a report, the ship she is in is attack by aliens. What does she do? Dance her way out of this mess and save the galaxy!

Gameplay wise is simple yet addictive due to its award-winning soundtrack. (It's a music game after all) This is how it goes:

1) Alien says directions in beat of music.
2) You repeat what alien says.

Kinda like a musical Simon Says.

And that pretty much goes on for the entire game. Which is incredibly short. Just 2 hours.

Take my word for it. If you're a niche person like me, don't miss out on this. And if this is not your type of game just give it a shot. It won't hurt. Satisfaction guaranteed. If you just so happen to see this in the bargain bin, pick it up. It's worth it if you don't have anything else to play.

Another reason to get this: Michael Jackson appears in the second half of the game to help Ulala save the galaxy. And yes. It the REAL Michael. Voice and dance and all. His last video game appearance before his passing.

Here's a trailer.



(PS Sega just released an HD remake of this game for the Xbox, PS3 and PC.)

Slice of Life: Lady In Elevator

So I was in the elevator holding a bunch of groceries and a lady walks in. She almost tripped (kinda like a stumble) so I smiled at her since I thought my bags made her fall and usually a smile symbolizes a silent apology. Turns out she tripped on her own dress so, to her, I looked like a jerk for smiling at a falling lady. Screw this for being nice.

Hipster Insight #2 - Choices

I will let my child know there are other phone OS's besides Apple like an Asian parent should tell their child there are other jobs besides businessman/engineer.

Hipster Likes #1 - TЁЯRA

A Japanese male-female duo. They write songs for Bemani. They're a rock group but they introduce electro into their stuff. I like it. Here are samples. Get the whole album. (DDR players may recognize some of them)

Escape To The Sky.



DoLL



ULTiM∧TE



North Wind



Raspberry Heart

Hipsters have no freedom of expression here.

Most creative South-East Asian youths are tied down by family pressure and social taboo whereby a job in performing arts will always be inferior to business/science. I know so many great instrumentalists, singers, dancers and musicians that are literally banned to take further studies in their field; instead being forced to become engineers/doctors/businessmen. Either from parental suppression or community condescendence. This sucks. Why suppress creative inspiration? Why keep the youthful from achieving their dreams? Just because parents/the community expect one to get a certain job doesn't mean they will be good at it. Why won't they learn that performance arts is no more inferior than the usual business/science?

What's worse is that kids are taught at a young age that being famous is hard. That I agree. However they are not told that you don't have to be famous to take further studies in music/acting/dance. It's because of this that they don't WANT to take further studies in their fields. They lack the confidence. They don't believe that they can do well in their fields.

And one more thing. You don't see music/dance/acting in school. They're part of the lesser clubs. The clubs that always gets left behind. The school systems here don't have music lessons. No music scholarships. No music competitions. It's all study, study, study. Gah. They don't give a crap about the arts.

Sigh. Rant almost over. I too am being tied down right now. Honestly I wish to major in performance while minor in musical theatre studies. I think I'm pretty capable. I got to Grade 8 in 4 years. Merits and above. But NOOOOOOOOOOO. The most I'm allowed to do is to take double majors in engineering and performance. Now that sucks. I can't even approach my career counselor. I can imagine the conversation.

Me - Hi. I want to take an undergraduate course in the performing field but I'm worried I can't find any employers here after I graduate. Advice?

Counselor - *snicker* You're kidding, right? *bursts out laughing* You? An Asian wanting since and dance and play piano!? HA! I scoff.

== Kthxbye.

Hipster Insights #1 - Grass

If one cuts grass and leaves it there to become fertilizer, is that cannibalism?

Hipster can't run

Sometimes when I exercise (yes, I exercise), I can't help but notice how cool joggers look. I know. Not something you'd find cool but it's true. Every time I see them I start to picture myself jogging. And I will always myself running like a drunk man. They say everyone can run. What they don't tell you is that if you're not a regular jogger you'll look like a drunk newbie. Long arms flapping away. That constipated look on my face. Uugh. Ugly. I'll stick to swimming.

Hipster dislikes #1

Musical commercials. I hate it. Ever since Glee you see them everywhere. Oregano. MyEG. Lipton. ENOUGH.
And that Colgate commercial. That horrible horrible voice-over. "Colgate TOTO." "Is that why my gums bleed sometimes?"

Hipster learnt a lesson #1

Never cut-and-paste when you want to transfer something. NEVER. Always always ALWAYS COPY-AND-PASTE. If your computer just turns off or your external memory storage stops working, all your data will be corrupted. All my music, movies, games gooooooooone. =(

Hipster? What's that?

Hipster by itself is hard to describe. Like art. Or the word 'The'. Or homework. But the best description I can give is this:

\hip-stur\n. Hipsters are a subculture of men and women typically in their 20's and 30's that value independent thinking, counter-culture, progressive politics, an appreciation of art and indie-rock, creativity, intelligence, and witty banter/remarks. One who possesses tastes, social attitudes, and opinions deemed uncool by the cool. The hipster walks among the masses in daily life but is not a part of them and shuns or reduces to kitsch anything held dear by the mainstream. A Hipster ideally possesses no more than 2% body fat, eats organic, loves animals and the environment.

So don't hold this against me.

Introduction

OK. My fourth blog. God I lack commitment. My last blog was OK but eventually I got bored and inspired. So VOILA a new one! Uhh, yeah.